Well, Bless Your Heart

-


The phrase, “Well, bless your (or her or his) heart,” has been assigned an undeserved negative connotation these days, I believe from Yankee writers who pretend to understand the South.


When I was growing up, blessing someone’s heart meant just what it says. Folks said it to or about folks who were going through a difficult time or situation because there just were no other words to convey one’s sympathy, or more importantly, empathy, because we’d all known hard times. We were asking God’s blessing on that person.


Take for example if you were standing in the churchyard after services talking about sister Beth who had lost her husband, or someone’s child home sick with chicken pox, or brother Clyde who just came home from the hospital, “Well, bless her (or his) heart” preceded the plans to take food to them, visit, and pray for them.


When a little one fell and skinned her (or his) knee the grown up in charge would scoop up the child and with a “bless your little heart” followed by a kiss to make the boo-boo all better.


What “bless your heart” did not mean, was that the person saying it thought the person to which it was directed was so stupid that ‘bless your heart” was the politest thing to say – which of course it is not, since now folks believe that is what it means. Some folks think it is a synonym for “dumb ass” which of course they would never say out loud, so they say, “Bless her (or his) heart.


So, this is just to let anyone who knows me—if I say, “Bless your heart” I am really asking God’s blessing on you whether your pain is a small boo-boo or a life altering crisis. It means I love you and care, even if I can’t do anything to change your situation. And, bless your hearts to all you Yankees who don’t know any better, and young Southerns who believe them.
.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

I Wasn't Really into Politics

-
Image
  I really wasn't into politics for most of my life. What I remember about politics was that Mama believed in voting for the man, not the party. Growing up almost everyone in my hometown were registered Democrat because there was some reason that had to do with voting in the primaries. I don’t know why to this day. But, in my idealistic 18-year-old brain I thought there should be a balance, so I registered Republican. And voted for Nixon! I worked at the poles and embroidered an elephant on my bell-bottomed blue jeans. Daddy defended Nixon through the whole Watergate thing, so I did too. I had no clue what it was all about. I don’t remember Mama voicing an opinion. She didn’t believe in arguing politics. It was forbidden at the dinner table. Fast forward past my young adult self. My husband was a union member and a shop-steward. He helped campaign for Kennedy. Our garage held stacks of yard signs and bumper stickers. He preached that the Democrats were for the working man. I di
Read more

I Wish I'd Asked Grandma

-
“I wish I’d asked Grandma while she was still here about the time . . ..” How many of us have said those very words? How many of us can’t remember the details of old stories once told out on the front porch after supper on a summer’s evening? Maybe we were young when the stories were being told and didn’t think we’d one day wish we’d listened more carefully. Wish we’d taken the time to write them down. I am preparing to facilitate a weeklong writing workshop titled Front Porch Stories . In this workshop we will be preserving those old stories we used to hear the grownups tell out on the front porch after supper. Before TV and computers folks told stories for entertainment. On a summer’s night after supper we sat out on the screened in front porch to catch a cool breeze and let supper settle before bedtime. We sipped iced tea or lemonade and talked. The little children played in the yard, chasing and catching lightning bugs. But even the children finally came to rest and lis
Read more

When the Lights go Out

-
Image
It is hurricane season, which heightens the chances of going without out power for a while. I learned there are lots of things we don’t really need to survive. Well, I already knew it from countless camping trips my husband and I took with the kids when they were little and we were poor. First of all flashlights will get you to the bathroom without stubbing your toes. And you can read by flashlight, find the potato chips and check to make sure the kids didn’t sneak out in the middle of the night. Second, cooking on the grill or over a wood fire is fun – for three days then it’s a pain in the tail because the kids get tired of gathering deadfall. Third, a five-gallon bucket and a toilet plunger will make a pretty good washing machine, and then there is the solar powered dryer, aka the clothesline. There are plenty of things you can do for fun besides watch TV or hanging out on social media: board games, read, walk, play out doors, sew, paint and draw, arts and crafts
Read more